I read once that, “In the absence of a decision, my money would be on panic”.
If it’s a matter of making a decision, then yes, I would have to put money on panic. Because we don’t know what the decision will be yet. Which means that we haven’t really decided on anything. Which would require an answer to, “Why do you want to do this?” And the answer is, “Because I want to”. And when we don’t have an answer to that, we panic. Because we don’t know what would happen, even though we know in our gut it’s likely to end up badly. So yes, even though we might have decided, in the absence of a decision, we would panic.
Now, here’s the key point, in the absence of a decision, it’s those decisions that we make that would be most pivotal. If it’s the latter, then, as I’ve said before, even though we have decided, in the absence of a decision, to do it, we would panic. Because our decisions would then be the ones that would bring about our outcomes. Which is only the case if we do decide to do it in the first place.
If it’s the former, then our outcomes are really not the crucial point. As we’ve already said, the lack of a decision would mean a lack of a decision. Which would mean a lack of answer to, “Why do you want to do it?” Which would leave us with the panic, and the inevitable outcome would be, “I’ll do it because I want to.” And which would lead us, necessarily, to act in ways that would lead to our outcomes. Which is never the right thing to do, but in this case it’s what would lead us to panic. Which would mean that our decision is irrelevant, to the right thing to do. Which means, logically, our decision is our outcome. And as we can know only our outcomes, our decision is the crucial point. And our outcome, obviously, is always what we would prefer.
And if it’s the former, then, by definition, there’s a decision made, there’s a decision made, logically, our decision is the thing to focus on. If it’s the latter, then our decision is the key point. And our decision is, in the end, not what we want. It’s always what we need. What we need is always the decision that would lead to our desired outcome. Which is never the case if it’s the former.
So the only conclusion to draw is that the only thing that really matters, by definition, is the decision that would lead us to our desired outcome. And if that decision is not made, if we don’t decide to do what we must do, then our outcomes are irrelevant. In which case there’s no point, there’s no point in making decisions. The only decision that matters is the one that we know we must make.
For example, as we’ve said, our decision to do this blog post would be the key. But the question is, “Is it the right decision?” And the answer to that is, obviously, of course not. Because the blog post, by definition, is not the right decision. But it is the right decision for us.
“The right decision” does not mean that this decision is the best decision. Because we know we must make it. It’s the right decision for us. So it does not mean that the right decision is the best decision.
“The right decision” does not mean that it would be easy, that it would be quick. It simply means that for us, this is the right decision. It is the right decision for us in terms of our lived experience.
For many of us, this must be made. We’re stuck in a rut because we’ve made a decision, we’re stuck doing this, and we’re resisting trying to do something else. We may have made a decision to take a different route to work today. And yet, when we get to work, we’re offered an entirely different option. So how can this be?
What we’re seeing here is the illusion of control. This is true for everyone, no matter what we decide to do. It’s part of the “illusion of choice” that so many of us find ourselves trapped in. It is so easy to forget that we do not have control over what happens to us.
What we’re experiencing is the effect of what we’ve decided. It’s the trick of choice, the illusion of choice, the “fog of freedom”. Where instead we’re faced with a choice between something we’ve decided we want and something we’ve decided we don’t want. What we’re experiencing is the illusion of control.
Choice is always a reaction to something else. Our choice is nothing but a reaction to something that happened before we made the decision. So, when we’re faced with an opportunity to do something we don’t want to do, we’re simply reacting to the fact that we’ve decided to do that thing. And what happened before we decided? What’s going on in our lives that would cause us to decide this as an appealing option?
In any case, we can always decide not to choose, to let ourselves decide not to do the thing we want to do. It’s as easy as letting ourselves decide not to get married. You can do this at anytime, anywhere, and with anyone you want. And really, it’s not much work. It’s not like we have to meet certain criteria or do certain things before we can decide not to marry. We can do this at any time and with anyone we want to. It’s called non-choice. And if you can decide not to get married, you can decide not to marry, and let yourself decide not to do whatever it is you want to do. But you can’t do this unless you decide not to get married first. That’s the difference between choosing and not choosing.
Our choices are based on what happened before.
Every choice we make is based on an outcome. And whenever we’re faced with a new situation, we have to decide whether we like the new outcome more than the old one. In fact, it’s part of the process that gives us the opportunity to choose anew. So whenever we’re faced with a new opportunity, we’re tempted to take it. Because the new opportunity is more appealing than the one we’ve been using, for it has a better outcome.
But whatever we choose has to happen for the old situation to disappear. That’s the law of attraction. If we didn’t have the new situation, the old situation would disappear. It’s a feedback loop that’s designed to keep everything in motion. So we always have choice to choose. And the only times we don’t have choice is when we’re not willing to choose. And this is when we don’t have a choice.
This is why we sometimes see situations where we’re seemingly not in a position to choose. But somehow we’re forced into a choice, whether it’s by our circumstances or our choices or our situations or something else. It’s all about the feedback loop. And this is the big key to all of our situations. There’s nothing we can do to make things happen that haven’t happened already.
This is why we can’t make everything turn out the way we want it to. We can’t change the past. And we can’t change the future. It’s all already happening.
And if you still find yourself struggling with all of this, if you’re still feeling like there’s something you should do but nothing you do seems to work, then it’s time to look at your circumstances and figure out where you’ve committed these kinds of choices to. Because it’s all in your choices, and none of it happens if you don’t choose something.
So take a close look at what you’re choosing to do and not do. Consider which choices you’ve already made and those you haven’t. And then, in your own face, say, “This is my truth. This is what I chose. And you have no choice but to accept it.
Kindly leave your comment.